lilly in the rose garden

Posts Tagged ‘30 Day Dec2013 Challenge

25. A picture of you a while ago/a picture of you now and your thoughts.

Ugh I am so lazy though

IMG_0273 - Copy

above: If I had to describe myself and my childhood in one photo, it might be this. Or maybe the one where dad put the dog on my head and my face was utter disgust and terror.

yay - Copy - Copy I was an awkward child

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Above: This used to be my absolute favorite picture of myself. I loved it. I thought I looked so cool. Well, looking back, it’s not too bad but wow I have come a long way.

tumblr_mw27brnmPw1ruodfbo2_1280[1] IMG_0321

~Look how far I’ve come~

also, wow. 2 years ago I NEVER would have shown so many real pictures. Now, I do believe this was major stupid of me to indulge in this question, but I don’t see the harm?

26. 5 things you look for in a person/relationship

I don’t know, I never put in that much thought. It just happens. I do value having a solid friendship/companionship to back up the lovey-dovey phases though.

27. Tell us about your sexuality. Do you think it’s possible to be completely straight?

I’ve heard people half-joke that all people are secretly bi. I hate that. It completely erases lesbians and gay men, not to mention any other queer individuals that do not identify with the label “bi.” It is true that plenty of straight people have been forced to adopt the straight label by society and, given the chance, might explore into the realm of other sexualities and means of expression. Some people are truly only attracted to the opposite sex or gender (they are different) but some people just aren’t. People are what they are and labels are totally at their own discretion. The less we assume that everybody is straight, the better.

As for myself, I’d rather not get into it. It’s not terribly complicated but I don’t feel like broadcasting that to the world. That’s not your business to know.

28. The year of your life that you loved most and why.

Whatever my final answer is to this, within a short amount of time, it will surely change. 2011-2012 was horrible. 2012-2013 was me rebuilding and regaining and making up for lost time. 2013-2014, I’m on top of the world, partying it up my way, cautious for something to come along and knock me down. We will see how 2014 fares.

30. 3 things you love and 3 things you hate about Tumblr.

Love: the pretty pictures and style icons, the ability to make a name, a niche for yourself OR hide in the shadows, depending on your taste, and the nice people I have kept in touch with.

Hate: the crappy video player, the crappy inbox system, the anti-sj crowd.

 

So that concludes this 30 day challenge. Well, it was an interesting challenge in that I pretty much sat one day and answered every single question and then queued each post, rather than answer them on the corresponding days. Not that it really matters? But I haven’t really learned or addressed anything new? All for fun haha.

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22. A letter to somebody who means a lot to you.

https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3114632/1/Three-Open-Letters

23. Tell us about you academically- how well you’re doing in school, your subjects, futures plans for higher education/careers.

I can’t answer this without further giving away my true age, hm. This year I am taking AP English, Honors Physics I, Honors Spanish I (I finished my 4 years of Latin), Advanced Honors Precal, and AP US History. I thought it would be a heavy load but they are actually are really easy right now. I do like under an hour of homework a night, mostly only math. I have A+s in everything but Precal (B). I’m skating through life, putting more attention into my hobbies than my school life. I’ll adjust when it gets tougher but at the moment….I doubt it. (I’ll probably pay for this attitude later) The issue is picking enough APs for next year to make it look like I’m actually trying.

As for the future…I have no plans, no direction, no focus or interest. I don’t know what I want to major in or where I want to go and the never-ending parade of adults asking me so repeatedly is annoying. My friends, all around me, have specific plans and ideas and dream careers and they know where they want to live and study and they’re working on fallback ideas and I’m sitting here like my honest answer to “Where do you want to be in 10 years” is “alive.”

24. List everything you’ve eaten/plan to eat today.

2 bowls of Cocoa Crispies, several cups of Sprite. A mini pizza (cheese with olives), a handful of beets. Chicken and Tortellini soup with some zucchini. Break ‘n Bake chocolate chip cookies with a glass of milk. A mug of tea. Another cup of milk.

I had less of a structured Breakfast –> Lunch —> Dinner kind of day since I woke up and ate cereal at 10 and then had pizza around 2. Dinner is usually in the 5-6pm range.

19. A photo of you from the last time you went out- tell us about it.

I suppose I could put any number of photos- from the Lolita meetup, from the private tea party, from Kobe Thanksgiving, from skating in the park. The selfie I took during Physics. I post those mostly on my ~official Lolita~ facebook, and not on tumblr.

I’m too lazy to format this on here since resizing photos is difficult.

20. Something you’re jealous of and why

I have a whole list of complicated issues with Verse, the annual poetry competition. I wholeheartedly and eagerly await its destruction this year. I will fight to bury that tradition and refuse to allow a new evil to crop up in its place.

21. On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being ridiculously happy and 1 being rock bottom, how happy are you today?

I generally live life in the 7-10 range, with 7 being my lowest of lows. I blog about it, forget the trouble, and move on. Lots of days I am a 10.

16. Go on your dashboard (tumblr), write down the names of the first 3 blogs you see and then fmk.

I’d rather not but the first three I saw were:

Internetfeet, gyarucoordinates, spookydragonfreak.

Internetfeet is Nikki, a cool local cosplayer and Lolita. I love gyaru coordinates, as that blog is a great resource and the blogger also coordinated a tumblr gyaru comm im in. Spookydragonfreak is my irl bestie Katie, who rocks.

17. Something you worry about a lot.

I do occasionally get overwhelming waves of self-doubt and turn to him for support, but I try not to dwell on those. Stop thinking about the past and the achievements of those around you. Write it, post it on a blog, and forget it forever.

18. A quote you live by.

If you had asked back in 2011, I would have responded “Do something satisfying”

13. A list of things you’d like to achieve in 2011.

Well, back in 2011, I listed out my goals, which included learning to sew, becoming a better Lolita, and coping with my crushing loneliness and low self-worth. I have done two of those quite well. I have no time to sew but I’m a fabu gyaru and Lolita and more and DAMN I am a FANTASTICALLY AWESOME person and don’t you forget it. I climbed up the social ladder to rightfully regain my position of clique leader, in part by merit and also in part by secret election/coup. Good stuff.

My goals for 2013 are just to maintain A+s while classes are easy, find a tiiiiny bit of direction for the future, just to make next year a little easier, and continue to have fun like I am right now.

14. Name one thing you’re excited for.

Exempting out of 4 exams and leaving school early to hit up Harry Potter world.

15. Tell us something you feel strongly about.

Well, us, I once spent an entire study hall period typing out a completely useless essay about why gyaru is a feminist fashion movement, or at least in short segments.

10. 5 things you dislike about yourself /want to change, and why.

Why would I stop and dwell on this? I don’t think I can come up with 5 things. I would simply have to lie.

11. Tell us the last person who hurt you.

Side note: who is this us. I am talking to myself in the venue of a blog. losers.

What kind of hurt? Physical: nobody. Emotional: probably myself. I’m more the inflictor than the victim sometimes.

12. 3 things that irritate you about people.

1. entitlement like crazy. There’s this girl who, on her sweet 16, wore a tiara and a “birthday princess” sash all day and got a sweet car but started parking in the SENIOR ONLY parking lot as a SOPHMORE and refuses to move her car to the correct lot. Everytime she talks, it’s all whiny. I don’t like this, take it out of the class curriculum. She never paid attention or respected the teacher and gave everybody attitude idk cuz she was older? Well, honey, I’m your upperclassman here to tell you to cut that shit out.

2. Why don’t people ever respect teachers. They are paid shit wages to teach snot nosed brats like you. If you want to sit on your ipad all class period long or just skip it twice a week, don’t sign up for the course. Easy. And if you for some reason need to leave the room, tell the teacher where you are going so we don’t have to start a manhunt w/ the front desk ladies to find you. GOSH.

3. “Well, I can see his point-of-view, but I have a hard time empathizing with him since I have NEVER had to resort to VIOLENCE to solve MY problems.” Oh can it already, we get it, you ask daddy to throw money at your problems until they go away. Stop trying to force your opinion on us all.

7. Your opinion on your body and how comfortable you are with it.

When I was younger, puberty and all, I hated it. I hated the lack of control I seemed to have over my own self, like the change was so rapid without any way to combat it. So, I hid myself away in ill-fitting clothing that barely reflected who I was as a person. I got so used to loathing and hiding, rinse, repeat. Then, I started to feel better but was in a clothing rut and besides, I had better things to do that worry about appearance, right? But people didn’t take me seriously as a person, as a girl, given my sloppy hidingness. So I stepped up my game. By forcing myself to embrace femme fashion (yes I had fucked up ideas about gender expression norms) I also forced myself to accept my physical self, after years of adjustment. I was older, more mature. I slowly moved towards more flattering, tighter clothes until I found styles and cuts I liked that screamed me without compromising my values. I love myself. Sure, given the option, I probs would switch around a few things. I look at myself and the people around me and I don’t see imperfections like media does- I see people that exist in a space that allows them little breathing room. So I constantly remind myself of how bangin’ I look, how my legs carry me where I need to go, how my arms stretch far, how my core is slowly strengthening. I don’t weigh myself. I don’t worry at all when I wear crops tops and short shorts, only to the extent of is something vital showing that I don’t want hanging out. I like me. I just really do.

8. Tell us the last person who texted you.

Him, naturally. and my girlfrond. but mainly my kismesis.

9. Your current relationship status and how happy you are about it.

Got my kismesis of 8ish months, my moirail of 3 years and my auspice so I’m good to go.


matryoshkaRose~ (the former lillymelody)
cosplay, street fashion, reviews and more!
When in doubt, come into the rose garden ( ・ω・)ノ

2015 Convention Schedule
AWA!!!

2016
Who the heck knows.
Metrocon
Dragon Con

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Here!
I got locked out of my lineplay u_______u
livejournal (matryoshkalilly)
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Hair growth progress- As of June 2015- I regularly trim my own bangs and they look amazing- choppy and short. The split ends have ruined lives and murdered small children. I haven't had a proper salon cut since July 2013. I might get a trim of 4ish inches by the end of the summer? I'm lazy.

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